15.6.11

I'm scared that I don't know how to write anymore. Maybe it's wanting something so bad, you're scared that you won't get it.

I wonder if you can train your brain to be positive? So you stop saying negative things and then eventually your brain catches up and stops thinking negative things.

I always thought my french would improve immensely by being around people I can speak it to...it hasn't. If anything, it's probably worse.

I don't write personal things anymore. I don't even think personal thoughts anymore. I think i'm trying to move away from this self-absorbtion. The world is not trying to be more difficult for me, by focusing my energy on thinking about things that are hard...i'm just stopping myself from thinking on how always be better. I listened to this business podcast that said that everytime you reflect on something negative that has happened, you re-live it again. So when i start thinking bad things, i say to myself...the only thing that's happening now is *insert whatever i'm doing*. It sounds so silly but it really does work. But maybe all it does is supress my feelings. I guess i'll find out.

I really have nothing to complain about. I'm busy all the time, but I enjoy everything I do and I have a life plan in place. I can always do better...but can't we all?

For some reason, my grammar is completely off. I don't know why.

xxx