23.11.09

Letters To Your Past

Dear You,

I remember when I first met you. You weren’t really my type. You would do really sweet things and then you would say something nasty even without meaning to- I looked like I was wearing P.Js, etc. Neither of us meant to fall but we did. I fell harder. I held back. You didn’t let me. You gave me an ultimatum. I didn’t want to lose you. Remember when you were scared because we were so perfect? I guess it was just too good to be true.

I remember when you asked for a break. My heart broke into a million pieces. I didn’t eat for four days. I didn’t sleep. It tortured my little heart. It was two days after you’d asked me to meet your mum. How was I supposed to get over that? How was I supposed to get over the fact that you thought I cheated with your best friend?

We got back together. You missed me. But I didn’t know how to put the pieces back together. We broke up. I ate. I slept. I cried sometimes. You were sweet sometimes. You hinted at us getting back together. I ignored the hints. You kissed me. I tasted it on my lips for days. You stopped talking to me. I called constantly. Just to talk. I talked, you listened. You said you had nothing to say to me. I cried a lot and called you some more. Days turned into weeks, weeks into months. I was no closer to getting over you. I left. Numbness set in. I talked to you, it started again. Months turned into a year. I still cried. I still called you sometimes. You ignored me sometimes. Humiliated me sometimes. You were adamant we couldn’t be friends. I cried some more.

I met other guys. They made me laugh. I still thought about you. Finally, I thought it was gone. I saw you again. You were nervous, your eyes lit up. It all came rushing back. You remained adamant. You ignored another birthday. One year turned into two.

I’m now over you, first love.

11 comments:

RocNaija said...

Wow.. I thought only guys felt this way..

Sting said...

Hmmm. e no easy. Glad u r over it. On a completely different note, some of the colors on ur blogs (the reddish purple) is hard to see. Just thought i'd let u know.

Sting said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dazzle! said...

Lol @ Roc...dint even knw guyz feel remotely close...gud to know :P

Glad you are over him...but are you really..hmn..

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

this post is quite universal. Nice to know you are over him. I'm going to send this to someone I know who doesn't believe that in due time she will forget her so-called love.

Hope all is well.


NIGERIAN CURIOSITY
IT WAS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN I ONLY HAD ONE...

Myne Whitman said...

It's hard to read some of what is written.

But I really agree with the write-up. It's not usually easy but you've done it.

tunrayo said...

this made me a bit sad, kinda reminds me of a time. so much emotions mixed. hope you're really over him, 2years is plenty o and sorry about the pain the process caused...

Rita said...

If you really are over him, then congratulations to you. It is not easy. But when you look back, you realize that you are much better than how you were treated.

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

Glad that drama was in the past, glad you over him girl you dont deserve this eish

The- Damsel said...

Sounds like something I went through a while back, its not easy...I'm gald ur over him there are better guys out there! So dont lose hope!

Anonymous said...

oMY GOSH! i JUST STUMBLED ACORSS YOUR BLOG AND SO FAR I HAVE LOVED IT. I DK I FEEL CONNECTED TO YOU IN SOME TYPE OF WAY... :( BUT YEA... THAT WAS GOOD... AS HURTFUL AND TRUTHFUL AS IT WAS.. WOW...